I didn't shave. On purpose
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Randomize
