my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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