idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
