youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
did i just pee glitter
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
