am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
there is puke in my bra ... again
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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