so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
