you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
