I wanna bring you to show and tell
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
