I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
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