This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
