i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Randomize
