Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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