she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
