Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Found the puke drawer
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
