Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
