just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
