I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
