like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize