had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
