We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
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