What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
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