I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
