yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
