The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
