in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
