There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
