yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
