Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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