problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
