I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
we're making bets on your personal life
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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