his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
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