hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Randomize
