is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
honey bunches of taint.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize
