He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
It's just like the Real World with babies
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
