i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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