SEEEEXXX PLEASE
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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