You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
