Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
