Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
This is the high leading the old right now
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I need to align my fucking chakras
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
