Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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