You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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