That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Randomize
