Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Randomize
