How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
