I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
True strength comes from lack of pants
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Randomize
