Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
