God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
