I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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