I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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