MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
